suddenly remembered i have to check my mail for important stuffs, so i came online. i texted him in mIRC, he didn't reply. i called him, he didn't pick up. i smsed him, he never reply. at first i thought he was playing games, maybe dota with wind and the rest. until 12plus, wind came back with kelly, so i know he's not playing game. so i've decided to leave mIRC and blog. now my phone is ringing, he's calling me back. i'm not picking it up. my heart tells me not to. too tired to entertain anyone now i guess.

okay, i'm lying. i'm not that tired. although he said he went to took a nap and left his phone at the computer table, i just feel so down all of a sudden. i don't know why and what is this feeling. songs make a person sad and think of the unhappy events. perhaps it has always been me who is demanding in this relationship and seeking perfection in it. that's why i always have this emotional rollercoaster ride. i can't help but to think why do things that could have been prevented always happened. the basis of all boils down to one major cause - observant. sigh. never mind. i guess sleep is the best way out now. i shall go sleep and try not think of things that happened recently.

_{sorry is the word you said the most to me}